As we enter a new year, 2023,
A client asked me about my new year’s resolutions, so I will write about them!
Shortly before my mother died, we had some intimate talks about her life and what she had wanted in her life. She noticed that she hadn’t really asked herself this question. Also, she realized why she didn’t know what she wanted, but that’s for another newsletter 😉
Many people don’t ask themselves this question: What do I really want? Maybe because they’re scared of never getting it, or because they’re afraid it won’t fulfil their expectations.
So, how do you find out what you really want?
If you knew you had only a month to live, what would you regret not having done, not having lived, not having achieved?
Take time with this question and then take the three most important things and write them down.
Now, take the first thing on your list and think about how you would feel if you had done this. You know this feeling! If you wouldn’t know it at least a bit, you couldn’t imagine having more of that. And you do want more of it! Now think about: What already makes you feel like this in your life? Sit down and contemplate this if you’re not sure.
Then, you may be surprised that seemingly insignificant things make you feel what you want to feel by actually achieving what you thought you needed to get. Think about how you can include these little things, or maybe they’re bigger, into your day-to-day life! Do that with each of the three items on your list.
And if, actually, the things you regret not having done are easily achieved, then, by all means, decide to do them. But then, schedule them on your calendar!
The feeling is more important than the doing!
And what’s more important than doing them is to allow yourself to feel what doing them evokes in you.
Then, revel, enjoy, and broaden this feeling because the feeling is more important than the act of doing things! Maybe not for your curriculum vitae and maybe not in other people’s eyes, but for your experience, it makes all the difference!
Let me give you an example of resolutions and feelings
Talking to a friend who had climbed one of the highest mountains on the earth as a dream that he had for a long time, this became very clear to me. He had trained, prepared and put into action so much for many years to ascend this mountain. But then, when he was on top of it and even finished with his whole expedition, he didn’t feel as grand and fulfilled as he assumed he “should” or could be.
This made him realize that he didn’t allow himself to really enjoy his accomplishment!
And he’s not the only person I know who told me something like that. So, be honest with yourself. When you manage to do something that you put quite some effort into achieving, are you taking time to congratulate yourself and feel all the wonderful feelings that come with it?
If not, well, it’s about time to do that!
And I know: Some people can’t! This is interesting for me because it shows that there are beliefs! Beliefs like “I am not enough,” “I am not worthy of feeling good,” “I haven’t done enough to be loved,” and more…
All these beliefs can be transformed into healthier and more joyous ones! It’s important to notice them; otherwise, they will run your life!
If you want help with that, it’s one of my favourite things to do! :)) Assisting others and myself in noticing limiting, heavy beliefs and letting them go, replacing them with thoughts that make us stronger and feel more joy, aliveness and connection.
Contact me to reserve your session to start finally feeling better!
Do you want more exercises to attract what you want? Click here